Monday 13 June 2011

Keep Young & Beautiful




Monday morning, and here at Milly & Dottie HQ the weather is decidedly bleurgh and to make matters worse the drizzly skies are conspiring to give us "bad hair days". Or is that just our age we wonder?
We might have found a solution




What do you think? To our minds, it looks scarier than the highest roller coaster ride at the fairground. Not sure if either of us would fancy plugging ourselves into a permanent wave machine that bears more than a passing resemblance to milking machine crossed with a chandelier...

We're strictly "wake up and wash your face" gals, the least time looking in the mirror these days the better. We were heartened when we found this lovely book the other day though...




Full of the most wonderful beauty tips from the 1930s and offering help for the over 30s (no mention alas of the over 40s or 50s - we guess it's just a question of following the advice and then some...). Physical exercise is, alas, advocated. The author expects the reader to 'sag around the waist" has visions of our hips running to fat along with our bust and imagines us sitting round shouldered, poked head and hollow chested ... how right she is.




But worry not, help is at hand - there are exercises aplenty - but oh dear they do involve wearing the dreaded navy blue knickers that we had to wear at school. Tips on walking properly which would, it seem, result in us striding along a la Joanna Lumley in Ab Fab.




Our wardrobes are also considered and perhaps our favourite tip is to always choose knickers "With a slippery surface" (and, we're guessing, reach from your waist to your knees!).



There are chapters on hair (rather a lot of the hairstyles seem to require being plugged in to the aforementioned "milking machine"), aids to a lovely skin, manicures. keeping well in all weathers, and (ha ha) how to put on weight.




We're off to beautify our throat and chins, guard against prematurely greying hair, indulge in some powder puffs, reduce our legs and launder our collars.


Overcoming Troubles...


If you however, are sitting "hollow chested and round shouldered" whilst reading this, you might like to read more - the book's in The Library. And if you fancy some vigorous striding through the departments of the Emporium in lieu of those physical exercises, we're happy to tell you that there are lots of new goodies lying in wait for you.

3 comments:

  1. No mention of crows feet, fallen arches or varicose veins then? I shall just stick to my daily constitutional to keep those muffin tops at bay. Now tell me.. where can I get my hands of a few gallons of asses milk?
    Dottie x

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  2. Remember the navy blue pe knickers well I loved pe

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  3. Remember the navy blue pe knickers well I loved pe

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